The Perfectionist's Dilemma

The problem isn't that perfection doesn’t exist; it's that the perfectionist doesn't even know how it can. If we conceive of therapy as having the overarching goals of thoughtfulness and accountability, then we can place the burden of proof onto the perfectionist, challenging them to prove what perfection is, how it can exist and how it would translate into self-esteem if attained. Perfection, and its pursuits, are mistakenly taken as givens—evidently worthy endeavors whose rewards contain magical, healing powers.

In treatment, perfectionism is often contextualized, understood in connection with excessive parental demands and mental illnesses, associated with both child and parent. While it's helpful to see how the fixation on parental approval and/or admiration shaped this obsession, it's equally beneficial to deeply consider the construct of perfection.

What does perfection mean? How does one get there? And how can it possibly make you happy? Patients may complain that nothing really makes them happy. And this usually implies that nothing ever meets their standard. While most of us just infer from this its excessive nature, additionally, and, more importantly, it's also nonsensical.

Please select this link to read the complete article from Psychology Today.